Our mornings are awful. Honestly, its a good thing we live alone at the end of a 1.5mile track because no one would be able to make eye contact with us if they saw how we tumbled, yelling, crying and screaming out of the house in the morning.
It wasn't so long ago that I was extremely disciplined about getting up, doing the chores, walking the dogs, and generally helping ease ourselves into the day. I would get up at the crack of dawn and be ready and raring to go when the kids and Kevin left for the bus at 8:20. Maybe it was a rubbish, wet summer or deadlines that made it hard to think straight, but my mornings now consist of:
- dragging myself out of bed at 7:30
- running around like a lunatic, usually screaming, sometimes crying
- kids missing the bus, Kevin having to drive them in
- Theo freaking out because that kind of chaos isn't great at a time when he is struggling with the transition of Georgia going to school.
- dogs not getting a walk, so taking their own wander...usually after pheasants that are being fed in our paddock (this is not a popular activity with the gamekeeper).
- chickens hollering until after 9 to be let out and fed
And then I wonder why I have a bad day, feel like a terrible mother/person/entrepreneur, get nothing done and feel generally like shit.
For me, this is a lesson I come back to time and time again. Its rarely the big things that make me feel like a success or a failure. Its the small things - checking things off my list, having time to make sure everyone gets off to school and work without sobbing, and that all important cup of tea when I sit down at my desk. If I can get these small details right the big things flow a lot easier.
So, this morning I was up at the crack, walked the dogs, made my list for the day and, already at 8:37am, I have been able to check 2 things off of it. Now its head down to get Shawls 2 in layout and off to print...and maybe have another cup of tea.